Learning About Myself, and Subsequent Options

A few things happened in close succession, which all feel related…

I got a full-time temp job doing fundraising data entry for Yankee Candle.  At the end of my first half-week (I had to start on Wed afternoon), I was rather zombie-like and I was missing tutoring so badly that it occurred to me that maybe I should look into becoming a science teacher.  This has only been reinforced after my first full week, as the feeling of my talents and skills being wasted is almost physical.

A spiritual teacher of a friend of mine posted something on Facebook about how to find what you’re passionate about:

To find your passion, identify what brings you the most pleasure. What do you love to do so much that you can’t imagine not doing it? What gets you fired up or into the zone? What gets you grounded and centered? Where do you feel most creative, present, in-the-moment and in the flow? What activities do you do that bring a smile to your eyes? What brings a sense of pride and accomplishment even if no one else notices? Look there.”  ~Karina B. Heart

I got an email from one of my engineering professors about an Instructional Assistant position that they wanted to hire for ASAP, for a course that I already tutor for.  It’s only 8 hours per week, and it’s temporary (likely just for this semester), but she’s offering $20/hour and it would get me back into tutoring (I had to drop all of my tutoring hours for this data entry job).  My immediate response was “YES PLEASE!!”

I found a website that specializes in historically accurate Victorian clothing patterns, specifically bustle dresses.  All the pieces are separates, so you can mix & match.  I got SO EXCITED I was almost freaking out, and I need to make things.  (The urge to craft is strong in this one…)

My tarot kinda threw down a gauntlet the other week, with this 3-card draw:

  • Justice (R) = Your overconfidence or lack of commitment may be working against you; You may need to stop sitting on the fence and make a firm decision to pursue your goal; Stop sitting on the fence for fear of upsetting others.
  • The Lovers = You are faced with a crucial life decision and must choose which path to follow; Consider carefully all ramifications of a major decision before making a final commitment; You are being put to the test before you can enter the next stage; At a fork in the road…
  • The Devil = Your fearfulness and negative thinking are hampering your life; Review your bondage to material goods, unbridled passions, harmful relationships, and financial security.  How are you enslaved in your life?  Why do you believe your fate is to suffer?  Confront your Shadow (dark side)…

So in response to Karina’s prompt, things that get me fired up:

  • Sewing: historical garb, costumes, & creatively using up my stash.  I have so many plans and ideas…!
  • Science: I really enjoy tutoring for math & science courses, and as much as I dislike children, I can kinda see me teaching things like math, biology, chemistry, physics….
  • Spatial Planning / Design: Tiny houses, Hobbit homes, using elements of Feng Shui
  • Working in my kitchen, baking & cooking.  I’m working on putting together a cookbook of recipes I’ve tried, “Grimoire of a Kitchen Witch”
  • I’m also really enjoying the witchy feeling I’ve been building, through working in my Book of Shadows and rereading some core books (working on Spiral Dance right now).  My BoS is starting to feel like a real working journal now.
  • I also have a HUGE desire to travel.  I’m hoping that I can start working on this with smaller trips and backyard adventures.  Maybe I can take a trip to Boston before winter sets in…
  • I can’t imagine not having at least one cat.

Possible options, now that I know that data entry (like this, doing the same thing all day), while not killing my soul, will not sustain me:

  • I need to call my temp agency and ask if I can take the TA position, maybe change my Tuesdays and Thursdays to half-days or something.  I really want to take this opportunity that fell in my lap.
  • Write out possible ways to get into teaching, & network with the people I know who are teachers. Should I stick with tutoring independently?  How much time & further education & money will becoming a teacher take?
  • What are some different ways for me to make money through sewing and crafting?  I think i could make a go of it by making stock of smallish, one-size items to sell via storefront; and a really nice portfolio, and use the portfolio to take commissions…
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